Breeze Flights from ORF to Spartanburg

Dear readers, I beg your pardon as I embark upon this narrative recounting the tale of a Breeze flight journey; a journey from the rather underappreciated ORF in Norfolk, Virginia to the Spartanburg of South Carolina. Yes, you heard it right – that’s Spartanburg, not Sparta (Leonidas' crew sends their regards).

One might surmise that these "Breeze" folks, who managed to pair the words "flights" and "breeze" together, were trying to sell the dream of winged chariots flying through cotton candy clouds. Yet, an iron bird is an iron bird, no matter how prettily you doll it up with romantic terminology.

But before we descend into the heart of this mythical journey, you might want to consider the ~magic~ of understanding flight schedules. It is a skill none should forgo. It’s no rocket science, unless one considers puzzles or Sudoku to be as mind-bending as figuring out the laws of thermodynamics.

Secondly, brace yourselves for the inevitable: “direct flights.” Now, these deceptive ditties are often sold to us as being easier, quicker and more convenient than their bothersome cousins, the “non-stop” and “connecting flights.” But remember, good travellers, that ease and comfort often hide monsters as scary as the Minotaur in the labyrinth of airfare!

For the uninitiated, a "direct" flight generally makes one think of jumping aboard the aircraft, snuggling into the miniature airplane seats, and landing directly at the desired location. But the airlines, you see, have a flare for sneaky scribblish. What they mean by “direct” flights is actually a flight that might stop at various other places before reaching your final destination. Imagine the horror!

Let’s not even start on the subject of airfare. I mean, who wouldn’t want the adventure of charting the fluctuating landscape of flight fare spikes and drops? It’s like a wild bull ride, but you’re just sitting at home clicking refresh on your computer screen.

Now the other key aspect to consider is which class to choose for this splendid adventure. Business class? First-class? Economy class? Or, dare we say it- premium economy? Yes, because we absolutely need four different ways to distinguish between levels of legroom and how generously the flight attendant smiles at you.

One must also not disregard the saga of the “baggage allowance.” You are playing in a Shakespearean tragedy where you, the protagonist, are cruelly separated from your beloved belongings because they weigh a pound more than the merciless airline's restrictions.

Lastly, let's not forget about the joys of the frequent flyer programs or the mileage program, where you must amass an unfathomable number of travel miles before you can even dream about getting a free one-way trip to your neighbouring town, if you're lucky.

So, for all you brave souls venturing into the world of airline voyages, remember to gear up, stay strong, keep an eye out for those flight deals, consider getting that red-eye flight if you are strapped for cash, and be prepared for the roller-coaster ride that is modern airline travel.

And do share with us your stories of bravery as you conquer the realms of absurdly-timed ‘last-minute flights’ or decipher the hieroglyphics of the ‘flight cancellation policy’. Remember, no aspiring regular flyer should embark upon their journey without assessing the airline reviews, navigating the turbulent seas of in-flight services and having a treasure map of the best-time-to-book!

All this replicated joy makes one wonder why teleportation isn't a thing yet. Until then, ladies and gentlemen, keep your seatbelts fastened and prepare yourself to fly the Breeze way from the ORF in Norfolk to Spartanburg. Happy, quite literal, breezing!